Category: Social Issues

Movie Theaters Will Have To Adapt To The Changing Times

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Art, Social Issues, Uncategorized

   Movies.
   That word alone conjures up all sorts of thoughts, memories, and emotions. Drama, comedy, action, science fiction, fantasy, romance… They allow us to escape from our everyday lives so that we can be in other places, times, and worlds. We can even be other people for a little while if we want.
   Kind of magical when you think about it.
   As to how we watch movies, there have been significant changes over the years, especially lately. Before the existence of television, going to movie theaters is what people did to watch a film, whether it was to see a big blockbuster or a low key drama. To watch a movie, you went to a theater. Grand movie palaces were built to enhance the experience. And before the main feature began, there were often news pieces and sometimes cartoons because remember, no one had TV’s at home.
   Then television was invented, and before long, virtually every household had a TV. People could watch the news at home so that the movie theaters ended up dropping news segments before the main feature. Same thing happened to the pre-feature cartoon shorts. Kids were watching Saturday morning cartoons on TV instead.
   But movie theaters still persevered and were quite popular. People enjoyed seeing films on the big screen. It could be a nice escape. Get out of the house for a little while. Perhaps go on a date at the movies. VCR’s and cable TV arrived on the scene after which some people began to worry about the future of movie theaters in general. But watching a movie on the big screen was still quite popular.
   These days, options for home entertainment have advanced greatly. Televisions have much higher resolutions now than those of the past, and most people have TV’s with significantly larger screens as compared to 15 years ago. In addition, streaming services (I’m talking about things like Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, On Demand, etc) have exponentially expanded the number of shows and movies people have access to at home. The result has been that (even before the pandemic), people on average have been going to movie theaters less frequently as compared to the past, and a growing number stopped going altogether. When the COVID Pandemic hit. With the risk catching COVID being such a concern and increased restrictions, movie theater attendance plummeted. For a while, the number of new movies being created also went down dramatically. Many people got even more used to watching movies at home.
   Now let’s be honest, with streaming services and high quality televisions, it’s really convenient to just relax and watch a movie in the comfort of your own home. Stretch out on the sofa or recliner and watch the movie whenever you want, whether that’s at 9 in the morning or 12:30 at night. And if you want to grab something to sip on or need to go to the bathroom, you simply press pause. Yep, it’s really nice. That’s why even before COVID, a growing number of people pretty much stopped going to movie theaters. And for those still going, on average, people were attending movie theaters less frequently.
   In the post pandemic world, while movie attendance has certainly increased as compared to the height of the Pandemic, the numbers are still below what they were 15 or 20 years ago. Another trend being seen is that people are more likely to go to the theater to watch a big blockbuster movie as compared to a smaller drama, comedy, or independent film. With the latter types of movies, people are more likely to wait and watch them at home.
   So what is the future of movie theaters. A number of smaller movie theater companies and independently owned theaters closed. Many were already struggling so that the Pandemic finished them off. The major movie theater chains reported financial losses in 2022 and have shuttered some of their locations. While I don’t think movie theaters are going to disappear in the foreseeable future, there will be changes in this new reality.
   Home entertainment options will continue to improve with advancing television technology and widespread streaming services. Movie theaters will have to accept that and the fact that a significant number of people don’t go to movie theaters anymore and that those who do, often go less frequently than in the past. Tactics theater companies may attempt to try to deal with the situation could include things like increased marketing, theater improvements (perhaps focus on theaters with fewer but larger screens), expanded concessions (like maybe alcohol sales and greater food options), more comfortable seating, showing live events (such as concerts, sports, etc), and membership programs for discounts. Even with these efforts, I think the total number of movie theater screens needed will be less as a percentage of the population as compared to 20 or 30 years ago. In order to stay profitable, companies will need to figure out how many movie theater screens are actually needed in an area; otherwise, if they have too many, they will lose money. There may also be more focus on attracting people to the blockbusters while just accepting that a growing number of films such as dramas, comedies, romances, and independent films are going to go straight to steaming services and have no theatrical release at all.
   In order to survive, movie theater companies will have to adapt to the changing environment and accept that home entertainment with large, high resolution televisions and expansive streaming services are the future. It will be interesting to see what happens.

The Fight for Full LGBTQ Rights and Acceptance Continues

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Current Events, Social Issues

   It’s 2024, and despite the fact that we are well into the 21st century, it is all too tragically apparent that we LGBTQs still have a long way to go for full acceptance, especially when you consider everything that has been going on of late. Think about it. Conservatives around the country are pushing anti-LGBTQ policies and laws despite the fact these hurt a great number of the population. We’ve seen far too many assaults and murders of people just because they were queer. A large number of LGBTQ minors live in homes that are not queer affirming, and things can get so bad that some run away while there are others who get kicked out even when they have nowhere else to go. Many LGBTQ people (like transgender, genderfluid, nonbinary, genderqueer, bisexual+) find dating extremely difficult to near impossible because of lack of acceptance. For many, it’s so bad that they are facing the hard reality that they will probably never find someone special.
   So what can we do about it? I know it can feel insurmountable at times. But there are things we can do to try to improve LGBTQ lives and acceptance.
   One is to speak up and make our voices heard. I realize that many LGBTQ people are not comfortable being out, and that’s okay. A person should only come out if they want to and choose to. But for those who are out and are comfortable and safe speaking up, making our voices heard can make a difference. There are a variety of ways to do this. One example is using social media to speak up and to share information. And please remember that it’s important to be as accurate as possible when doing this because spreading bad information is counterproductive as well as just plain wrong. Day to day interactions with non-LGBTQ friends and acquaintances also help so that people realize that we LGBTQs are decent human beings who deserve respect and human rights as well.
   Something else we can do is encourage greater and more accurate LGBTQ representation in movies, TV shows, books, video games and so on. Supporting examples that succeed in accomplishing this is one way. Another is to contact the creators themselves (such as authors, directors, etc) via social media, websites, and so on to tell them what we want. When doing this, it’s important to say thank you to those who provide good LGBTQ representation as well as challenging those who do not.
   Another thing we can do is to support businesses which are pro-LGBTQ, try to avoid those which are not, and speak up about what we are doing. And when a business is especially anti-LGBTQ, we can encourage as many people as possible to avoid that business and even boycott it.
   And of course vote! Get out and vote for elected officials who support and will promote LGBTQ rights. Remember that every vote counts, and that absolutely includes yours!
   In terms of LGBTQ rights and acceptance, we have come a quite a ways, especially when you consider what it was like 20 or 30 years ago. But we still have a long way to go, and if we make an effort, we can continue forward in our quest for full rights and acceptance. And that will make the world a better place for everyone.

How Will Trump’s Felony Convictions Affect Voters?

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Current Events, Social Issues

5-31-24
   Donald Trump has been convicted of 34 felonies. He is a criminal by any definition. In addition, we also know that he is an habitual liar, has authoritarian tendencies, and is more than willing to undermine America’s democratic values for his own personal benefit and quest for power. Millions and millions of Republicans have continued to blindly follow Trump despite the clear evidence of how dangerous and unqualified he truly is. Now, the question is how will his felony convictions affect voters’ decisions.
   One thing that is extremely obvious is that if Trump was a Democrat, Democratic voters would have rejected him a long time ago. Don’t believe me? Consider Al Franken, the popular comedian who became a Democratic Senator. When photos emerged that had been taken years before showing him on a USO tour pretending to touch a sleeping female colleague’s breasts, Democrats turned on him very quickly which resulted in his resignation. What he did in the photos was clearly inappropriate, but it does not appear that he actually touched the woman. He was pretending to as a joke. While in particularly poor taste, it pales in comparison to things Trump has said, done, been accused of, and now convicted of, yet Republicans continue to blindly follow Trump. Here’s another example of what I’m talking about. Former Governor Andrew Cuomo of New York was a very popular Democrat that many Americans turned to for leadership during the COVID Pandemic. It seemed that his political future was quite promising. But after allegations of sexual misconduct came to light, Democrats rejected him very quickly. High ranking Democratic leaders even recommended an investigation of him. His political career was over.
   Most Republicans have continued to blindly follow Trump despite everything he has said and done. The truth is, most Republicans have shown themselves as much more likely to be blind followers as compared to Democrats. The way millions and millions of Republicans continue to blindly follow Donald Trump is overwhelming proof of this. So it leaves the question: how will the fact that Donald Trump is now a convicted felon affect how people vote in the November election? The scary and extremely dangerous fact is that the vast majority of his core followers are going to believe Trump’s lies and vote for him in overwhelming numbers. Even though Trump has been convicted of 34 felonies by a jury of 12 ordinary Americans (who had been agreed upon by both the Prosecutor and the Defense), MAGA supporters will devotedly believe Trump’s lies making ridiculous, outrageous conspiracy claims and other nonsense.
   The big question will be if and how Trump’s convictions affect Independents and other swing voters. How many of them will think twice about voting for Trump? How many of those who were leaning towards voting for Trump will now reconsider that possibility? At this point, nobody knows. The United States is in uncharted waters. An American President, or former President, has never been convicted of a felony before. Plus, we are dealing with a severely divided nation politically and an authoritarian style leader whose mass of hard core supporters have proven themselves to be blind followers.
   Troubling and scary times indeed.
   It’s that much more reason why those of us who see how dangerous Trump is need to get out and vote against him in overwhelming numbers. We also need to be smart about our vote because like it or not, the next president will be Trump or Biden. That is reality. It’s also why we must get out and vote for Joe Biden in overwhelming numbers, even those of us who have legitimate concerns about Biden, because voting for a third party candidate, who has zero chance of winning, or not voting at all is helping Donald Trump. That is cold, hard reality. And this country cannot afford another 4 years of Donald Trump in the White House, especially now that he’s a bitter, convicted felon.

Why are Open-mindedness, Tolerance, and Diversity Under Threat?

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Bi+/LGBTQ Issues, Current Events, Social Issues

5-1-24
   It’s the 21st century, and one would hope that open-mindedness and tolerance would be improving, that perhaps there would be a glimmer of hope on the horizon of a better, more supportive world in our future. But alas, that is not what is happening. Instead, much of the Republican Party is now pushing policies that are based on ignorance, bigotry, and blatant prejudice. They are trying to take us backwards. What happened to kindness, tolerance, and understanding? What happened to celebrating diversity? What happened?
   For a while, it seemed like the United States was moving in a positive direction in this area, such as when same gender marriage was made the law of the land. But unfortunately, hardcore, right wing extremists are pushing back with policies that are based on ignorance, fear, and horrendous bigotry. They want a world where their narrow-minded vision of how they want everyone to be is forced upon the entire population, even when the majority does not agree. I mean look at what’s happening in states such as Florida, Arkansas, Tennessee, Texas, and others where vicious anti-LGBTQ laws are being passed and female reproductive rights are being severely restricted or abolished. Most people in the United States support a woman’s right to choose and back things like same gender marriage, but the far right extremists don’t care. And what’s even more dangerous is how so many other people, who deep down may realize what the far right is doing is wrong, are going along with it.
   It’s sad, tragic, and dangerous. The rights of millions of Americans are literally at stake, as is democratic values for all Americans.
   Again, I ask: why is this happening?  I think fear, ignorance, closed-minded thinking, and prejudice in many ways are feeding this. People are often afraid of things they don’t understand or when they feel their way of life is being threatened. A significant number of cisgender, straight individuals don’t get the LGBTQ community and often have intolerant views with regards to it. Quite a few even see being queer as a sin. Speaking of religion, many of these far right extremists see abortion as a sin as well and are actively trying to legislate their personal beliefs upon everyone else despite the fact most people support a woman’s right to choose. Then consider how conservative,  straight, white individuals, especially men, who have had dominant control over American government and society for hundreds of years, fear that their authority is slipping away as diversity and open mindedness are encouraged. Many of these individuals have a serious lack of understanding of what it’s like for people who are queer or for a poor young woman who finds herself with an unexpected pregnancy. This frequently leads to intolerance and prejudice, and let’s be frank, there are some who do have some understanding of these issues but don’t care due to blatant bigotry and desire for control. And what makes this even worse is how there are many Republicans, or individuals who often vote for Republicans, who realize the actions of these far right extremists are wrong but still go along with it.
   So what do we do about it?
   Speak up and speak out, at least those of us who are able to do so. We need to make our voices heard and try to educate people. I realize that hardcore MAGA enthusiasts are not going to listen to us anytime soon, but there are some moderate Republicans as well as Swing voters who might. We at least have to try. Remind them that some of their friends and relatives are LGBTQ or have contemplated having an abortion. Bring home the fact that we are people too and deserve the same rights as everyone else. And another thing we need to do: is vote! Vote like our futures depend on it because in many ways, they do. And be smart with your vote. We need to vote as many Republicans out of office for the foreseeable future as possible, and in terms of the 2024 presidential election, whether people like it or not, the next president will be Biden or Trump. So let’s get out there and vote for Biden in order to make sure Trump doesn’t get back in. Voting for a third party candidate or staying home is helping Donald Trump. That is cold, hard reality everyone.
   Let’s do our part in battling for a better, more open-minded future.
  

Proof Many Americans Can Be Blind Followers

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Current Events, Social Issues

4-13-24
   Ever hear of the Milgram Experiment?
   It was a study conducted in the 1960s at Yale University by psychologist Stanley Milgram. The purpose was to see how far people would go in obeying an authority figure, and it’s results were truly frightening, more so when considering the ramifications we’re seeing today. The proof is happening right before our eyes in how millions of Americans are blindly and devotedly following authority figures such as Donald Trump and others no matter how outrageous, dangerous, or despicable their actions and lies.
   Let me explain.
   Participants were selected via an ad that was put out in a newspaper looking for volunteers to be part of a study that involved learning. They were all men between the ages of 20 and 50 whose jobs ranged from unskilled labor to professional. They did not know that the real purpose of the experiment was to see how obedient they would be to an authority figure.
   The set up was as follows.
   There was an experimenter who would wear a white lab coat and two other individuals. One of these was the volunteer and the other was actually working for Stanley Milgram but was pretending to be a volunteer. These two individuals drew straws to decide who would be the teacher and who would be the learner (this was rigged so that the volunteer would always be the teacher). The volunteer was told that the learner would be given word pairs to remember. As the teacher, he would then be expected to say a word to which the learner was supposed to choose the correct match out of four choices. When the learner made a mistake, the volunteer was to administer an electric shock. Furthermore, every time the learner made a mistake, the shock would increase by 15 volts. There were two rooms that were connected via microphone. In one was the experimenter and the volunteer (the teacher) while in the other room was the learner. The experimenter was sitting at a desk wearing his white lab coat, and the volunteer was at another desk that had the device which he believed would deliver the shocks to the learner. The first switch said 15 volts, and each of the following switches increased by 15 so that the last switch said 450 volts. The volunteer had been told that each switch would send a shock of electricity to the learner whom the volunteer believed was sitting in a chair with electrodes attached. In reality, the learner had no such electrodes.
   Once a session started, the learner purposely made lots of mistakes and had a prearranged script that he would use as the voltage increased. If the volunteer questioned the experimenter about what he was doing, the experimenter would prod him to continue up to 4 times.
   Prod 1: Please continue.
   Prod 2: The experiment requires you to continue.
   Prod 3: It is absolutely essential that you continue.
   Prod 4: You have no other choice but to continue.
   At 75 volts, the learner would start the scream in pain. From 150 to 330 volts, the learner would protest with increasing intensity and complain of his heart bothering him. At 330 volts, the learner would refuse to go on, and after 330, he would go silent.
   The results were beyond disturbing. All the volunteers continued up to 300 volts, and 65% of them went all the way to 450 volts. Think about that. After the learner went silent, the volunteers would have no idea whether the learner was unconscious or possibly even dead, yet 65% of the participants continued asking questions and inflicting shocks up until the maximum 450 because the authority figure in the form of the experimenter told them to.
   Think about that. I mean really think about it. When you combine the strong tendency many people have to follow authority figures with devotion that has gone too far, this easily leads people to go along with and contribute to distortions, misinformation, and wrongdoings to a dangerous degree. Authoritarian leaders have relied on this behavior throughout history, often adding fear into the mix as well.
   In the United States today, Donald Trump is an example of someone using these types of tactics in his quest to gain and hold as much power as he can get away with. Many people have shown a willingness to an extreme degree to follow his authority, even when he is clearly and outrageously in the wrong. The evidence that Trump lost the 2020 election is beyond overwhelming. He lost fair and square. Yet millions of Americans and numerous Republican politicians continue to go along with and even spread Trump’s lies about the outcome. Republicans are even pushing for new laws based on these blatant lies. A number of individuals who were in the mob that stormed the United States Capitol Building on January 6th, 2021 have openly said they did so because they believed Donald Trump wanted them to. While Trump doesn’t use fear to the degree that people like Joseph Stalin did, he does use use it, like when trying to make his followers afraid of immigrants and of those who disagree with him politically. Many Republican politicians continue going along with Trump no matter what. Some are true devoted followers while others do so because they fear Trump will turn on them and get his blind followers to vote them out of office.
   It’s scary seeing this behavior going on in the 21st century, but it absolutely is.
   People need to open their minds and think for themselves. They should get information from a variety of different, independent, reputable sources and not just from those that tell them what they want to hear. People should strive to learn about what a leader is really trying to do so that they can then make informed decisions about whether they agree with that individual or not.
   People need to quit blindly following others because our democracy and decency as a society depend on it!

Why is Intolerance Permeating Society so Badly?

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Bi+/LGBTQ Issues, Current Events, Social Issues

3-19-24
   Why is there so much intolerance, prejudice, and hate these days? Why? In terms of open-mindedness, tolerance, acceptance, and decency, unfortunately, it seems like society has gone backwards of late, and in addition to that being sad, it’s hurtful, dangerous, and can cause lives to be lost needlessly and tragically through attacks and suicides.
   People often fear what they don’t understand which in turn can feed intolerance, prejudice, and hate. Instead of learning about the subject of their fear and opening their minds, many people gravitate towards automatic assumptions, distrust, outdated views, false information, and narrow-mindedness. Making matters worse is how much of the population these days only seeks out information from places, sites, or people who share their ideas instead of utilizing a variety of different sources and viewpoints. They nestle themselves into an isolated, close-minded environment that will reinforce what they want to hear.
   Added to this cauldron of toxicity is how numerous political leaders (such as Donald Trump), organizations (such as some churches or news outlets), and others are exploiting, and at times even encouraging, people’s fears and intolerances in order to gain support in their quest for ever more power. When people who already have prejudiced views hear political leaders, ministers, or other organizations they respect spewing off hate, it emboldens these individuals to be more open about their own bigotry and even worsen it. And the greater the power these leaders or organizations have, the stronger their negative influences become.
   Want an example? Think about how Republican politicians are pushing anti-LGBTQ legislation around the country. It’s not a coincidence that upticks in violence aimed at LGBTQ people are also being seen, especially in states where such legislation has become law. Since Republican leaders are showing their prejudices against the LGBTQ Community with their rhetoric and actions, everyday people feel more emboldened to do so as well.
   These are scary times indeed. So what do we do about it?
   Living by example is one thing we can do, exhibiting kindness, decency, open-mindedness, and tolerance in our everyday lives. Speaking out and making our voices heard is also extremely important these days. We can do this in day to day interactions with people as well as by utilizing social media and websites. We need to stand against intolerance and bigotry while promoting open-mindedness, tolerance, and decency instead. We should educate others on issues they don’t understand and encourage them to seek out a variety of different sources for information as opposed to only listening to those that tell them what they want to hear. For news, they should should check out sources such as CNN, USA Today, the Washington Post, the Associated Press, the New York Times, NPR, the BBC, and others. Not just watch Fox News. We must vote against politicians who are promoting hate and elect in leaders who stand for decency and open-mindedness instead. We can also avoid organizations and businesses that push intolerance and patronize the ones promoting kindness instead. This can also hit them where it hurts: their pocketbooks!
   I’m not saying it will be easy, but we can battle against the wave of intolerance, prejudice, and hate infecting society today. It’s up to us.

AI, Robotics, and Jobs

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Current Events, Social Issues

12-12-24
   People are breathing a sigh relief that the actors strike has finally been settled, and let’s be honest: we want to see her favorite TV shows and movies as soon as possible. We want to be entertained. It’s human nature. But you know what? We need to remember that the concerns the actors union had with regards to AI technology were quite valid. Now, I want to point out that I enjoy and use technology and recognize how it has helped humanity in many ways. But like with anything, there are pluses and minuses. And the truth is: as technology continues to advance, in the future, many jobs will likely become threatened.
   We’ve seen in the past how as technology advances, some jobs become obsolete. Consider how horse-drawn wagons were so vitally important to society before the invention of the automobile. A significant number of people were employed directly or indirectly to this industry. But once automobiles became commonplace, many of these jobs virtually disappeared. In the past, what has typically occurred in these circumstances is that as some job types disappeared with the advancement of technology, people shifted to other career choices, some of which were created by the new technology. While very few people were needed to create and maintain wagons and wagon wheels anymore, a very large demand arose for the construction and maintenance of vehicles running on combustion engines.
   But technology is now advancing to such a degree that in the future, AI and other types of robotics will be able to perform many jobs more cheaply and more effectively than humans. The other issue is that we’re not just talking about one career field. This is going to be affecting many, many types of jobs. It’s likely going to get to a point where there just will not be enough employment opportunities for enough of the population. We’ve already seen how factories employ smaller numbers of human workers due to robotics. Imagine a time when stores are using AI and robotics to restock shelves, check people out, serve customers in restaurants, perform most construction jobs, do the majority of secretarial work, the list goes on and on. In such a future, we will get to the point where there will not be enough new jobs to go around because AI and robotics can do things so much more effectively and for less money than humans.
   What happens then? Society can’t effectively and humanely function if 30, 40, 50% of the working age population isn’t working because there literally is not enough work to go around. How will people survive? Also, for economies to function, humans need to buy and sell goods and services. But that starts to fall apart when such a huge chunk of the population isn’t working (and thus not having incoming employment paychecks).
   Societies around the world are already having to grapple with some of this, and the issue is going to get much more severe. And what is frightening is that no one seems to have a good, long term answer on what to do. Technology is going to continue advancing. But we’re going to have to come up with something in order to keep society functioning in a way that is both humane and realistic.

African American Hero From The American Civil War

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in History, Social Issues

   William Carney was born a slave in Norfolk, Virginia in 1840. His father, William Sr, escaped North via the Underground Railroad and after working hard, was able to buy freedom for the rest of his family. They settled in Massachusetts where young William learned to read and write, planning on becoming a minister.
   However, in 1863, 23 year old William Carney joined the 54th Massachusetts Black Regiment instead. He was now a soldier in the American Civil War.
   In July of that year, the 54th and other Union forces were gathered outside Charleston, South Carolina preparing to take part in the assault on Fort Wagner, one of the installations guarding Charleston Harbor.
   On the 18th, the 54th was taking cover behind sand dunes about 1000 yards from the fort. When nightfall arrived, the order was given.
   Advance.
   The 54th was leading the attack on Fort Wagner.
   After dressing their lines, the regiment moved across open ground under withering cannon and musket fire. Seeing the color bearer start to fall, Carney quickly dropped his gun and grabbed the flag moving to the front of the line. He and the 54th continued forward through a storm of bullets, cannonballs, and canister. Soldiers fell all around with terrible bloody wounds, but the regiment kept going with Carney at the front holding the American flag aloft.
   He crossed a ditch and clambered up the fort’s earthen wall. When Carney arrived at the top and looked around, he found himself surrounded by dead and wounded members of his battered, bloodied regiment.        
   At that moment, William Carney realized that in his area, he was the only one still standing.  
   Seeing Confederate forces advancing towards him, Carney worked his way back down the wall through the carnage and made it to the ditch that was now waist deep in water. Pausing there, he thought about his next course of action. As he rose up to get a better look around, William Carney was shot. A second bullet struck him shortly after. While Carney was painfully pushing his way towards friendly lines, he came upon a soldier from the 100th New York who asked if he was wounded. As Carney responded, a third bullet grazed his arm. The soldier came over to help him, offering to take the flag, but Carney wouldn’t let it go. Together the two men, one black and one white, struggled towards Union lines during which a fourth bullet grazed Carney’s head.
   When they made it back, he refused to give up the flag to anyone except another member of his regiment. Once they reached other survivors of the 54th, Carney said, “Boys, the old flag never touched the ground.”
   In 1900, William Carney was finally awarded The Medal of Honor.

Why Do Some People Find Romance While Others Don’t?

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Bi+/LGBTQ Issues, Social Issues, Uncategorized

   Why do some people find love and romance while others don’t?
   Have you ever wondered about that? I certainly have, especially considering I’m one of those who’s never found it. So of course, I’d like to know why. But I think it’s safe to say that I’m not the only one who ponders this question.
   There’s a whole myriad of reasons why some people connect with amazing chemistry while others don’t. And let’s be honest: entire books could be written on the subject and still probably not scratch the surface. But I’m going to give you a few of my thoughts on the subject.
   So let’s dive right in! 
   Multiple factors such as personality, interests, outlooks, prospects for the future, people’s pasts, and more come into play with regards to whether connection occurs or not. Sometimes, people who are very similar fall in love and connect while other times, it’s two individuals who seem like total opposites. There are those who want a relationship that’s adventurous and passionate while others want one that feels more safe and reliable. Often, it’s a combination of things that people are hoping to find. Many times, the reasons why two people don’t happen to connect are understandable, reasonable, and a part normal life. These can include factors such as interests being too different, having little to nothing in common, lack of physical attraction, personalities clashing, and so on. These things happen. It can be really, really hard to find someone with whom you have true, romantic connection.
   But there are situations where the reasons why one individual refuses to go out with another are more questionable and problematic such as when they’re based on ignorance, prejudice, and intolerance. People often fear or are at least very uncomfortable with things they see as too different and/or don’t understand. This in turn can then lead to their having instant, knee jerk reactions where they automatically refuse to even consider getting to know someone. They don’t give the person the slightest chance. This is clearly very hurtful to the individual being subjected to this kind of treatment, but it also means that the person being narrow-minded may be missing out on something potentially wonderful. Examples of individuals who face this sort of intolerance far too often include people who are bisexual+, transgender, genderfluid, nonbinary, shy, dress differently, or are seen as too different for some other reason. The result is that many people feel unnecessarily isolated and lonely.
   So what can we do about it? Think about how society would be so much better if more people would open their minds and expand their horizons. Instead of automatically rejecting someone they initially see as different, they’d be open to educating themselves and getting to know the individual instead. Perhaps something beautiful would result, or maybe they could become good friends. And sure, while there’s always a possibility that nothing would come of it, people won’t know unless they open their minds and give it a chance.

Time to Open Minds and Broaden Horizons

by inmanb17cedcb09, posted in Bi+/LGBTQ Issues, Social Issues

   When most of society sees you as a bit too different (whether it’s because you’re LGBTQ, are quiet, wear unique clothes, whatever), it can be extremely unsettling, disturbing, isolating, and downright painful when people you know and thought you could trust don’t believe you when you tell them who you are. It gets worse when they keep sticking to their guns despite your continued efforts to explain the situation to them.
   People from all walks of life run into this problem. For example, it’s very common for those who are LGBTQ. It may come in the form of friends or relatives trying to convince a queer person that they’re not really queer, that it must be just a phase or confusion. The situation is compounded when the LGBTQ individual still won’t be believed despite their repeated efforts to explain who they are and how they feel. And it’s not just LGBTQ individuals who run into this issue.  Others such as individuals who are quiet, have distinctive clothing styles, pursue unique interests, are neurodiverse, or are seen as a bit too different for some other reason commonly run into this problem.
   It leaves us wondering why this happens?
   Think about this: people are often uncomfortable with things they see as too different and don’t understand. As a result of this, it’s not uncommon for people to want to either change the individual whom they see as too different or to distance themselves from that individual, both of which are painful and isolating to the person subjected to this. It also leaves the people who are exhibiting this behavior as more narrow-minded to the diversity and beauty of life as compared to what they could be.
   So I encourage and even plead for everyone to open their minds to things they may not understand and initially might see as a bit too different for their comfort. Now, I’m not saying put yourself unnecessarily in harm’s way. There are situations (like if a person is being threatening, dangerous, etc) where distancing yourself is the right move. But if someone you know, for example, says they’re queer or like wearing clothes you personally think are kind of out there, instead of automatically trying to distance yourself from them or immediately trying to change them, strive to learn about the situation first. Be open to the possibilities and expand your horizons. For in doing so, there’s a very good chance you’ll be pleasantly surprised, in which case, the lives of everyone involved will likely be improved.